Brain Lapse

Why the hell did I go to Pei Wei today? I have been doing so well on Weight Watchers and then the overwhelming desire to have Spicy Chicken took over my brain. Looks like I will be spending the night in the gym! Joy! At least it is FRIDAY! My mom is going to New York for the weekend and I am oh so jealous…minus the extreme temperatures that they will be experiencing.

I can’t believe it but my mom and step-dad are celebrating their ten year wedding anniversary this month. I still remember the day that got engaged…it was Christmas. My step-brother and I had opened all of our presents when my step-dad walked in and said that there was one more big present hidden under the tree. Yay! Of course we thought it was going to be something radical for us…but no. It was an engagement ring for my mom (insert disappointed cartoon noise here). My step-brother and I were really upset because we thought if our parents got married, they would inevitably forget about us and we would be forced to live out on the streets – oh to be a kid again. I ran upstairs to my bedroom in tears and my step-bro followed close behind, in a pair of underpants alone. He had a habit of running around in nothing but tighty whities – you would have thought he might dress up a little for Christmas but it was not the case; after all, he was only nine.

Eventually we got over it and were excited for our parents to get married. In fact, in the following years we would get scared every time we thought they were going to get divorced. We would write each other letters saying how we would “cry all day if we couldn’t be brother and sister anymore.” We were both insane back then, but hey, we survived! ;)

I hope everyone has a fabulous weekend – go do something fun and if you are in Texas, enjoy the beautiful weather!!  It will be summer and 100 degrees before you know it - sooo excited about beach weather!  The picture at the top always makes me miss the ocean!

Anyone have any fun plans??

My Brother was an FBI Agent...

For the first time in my life, I need a new cell phone. All the previous cellular purchases were strictly because of want and were in no way a necessity. Ok, ok…I don’t really NEED one, but I want one! I guess nothing has changed after all…

This I can say – the cell phone that lives in my purse has outlasted all of the previous models I have owned. In fact, I have had my Blackjack for almost two years now which is the longest on record. It all started with my mom’s car phone – not cell phone, but car phone. Back in the day my mom drove a black Buick Park Avenue which featured a sweet-A car phone. It literally was connected to the floorboard and served no purpose other than for my step-brother’s communication with the FBI. That is right – the “FBI.” When we were little, he thought every black car was made to transport members of the FBI and since my mom’s car was black, she was obviously a secret member herself. He would always try to beat me to the front seat so he could receive our mission for that day via car phone and if he were so lucky as to snatch the coveted seat, I knew I was in for it. He would strap his little body into the seat and get on the phone immediately, all while turned around in his seat giving me that glare of his – my mom was nice enough to play along and most of the time we would take unnecessary turns around the city because of our “orders.” I can still remember how MAD I would get!

When I was sixteen I FINALLY got a cell phone of my own and until recently, I would upgrade every chance I got. The Blackjack has been a faithful companion and now that is time for my upgrade, I almost feel a little guilty. It is light years above that old car phone, which now that I think of it, happens to be the source of quite a few hilarious memories. I hate to think that I will never again see my little brother make another call to the FBI in the Park Avenue, but then again he will be 19 tomorrow! I am getting old…

As for the phone, we will see. I might just keep it a while longer.

XOXO

Why can't I be a Rockette?

Last night the family got together to celebrate my mom's birthday!  We always let the birthday person decide what they would like to do and my mom chose to go see...the Rockettes.  When I was young I wanted to be two things:  Jessica Rabbit and a Rockette.  Sadly, neither of those were in my future but I am still torn up about the Rockette piece.  I went to my ballet lessons religiously as a child and actually turned out to be a pretty damn good dancer.  But there was one problem - I realized I would never be tall and I would never consent to doing the jump splits.  Yow.  As for the Jessica Rabbit thing, that faded quickly.

Anyway, we went to this fabulous restaurant called Michelangelos.  They have great food but the absolute best creme brulee on earth.  I just had to take a picture so I can think about eating it once I start up the old Weight Watchers again (tomorrow).  Then we headed to the show.  It was a good show but it was also a Christmas show so it was a little strange seeing as how Christmas has already come and gone.  My mom loved it though so it was all worth it.  Hopefully, I will have more pictures later...the camera is acting up and I don't have the patience to fight with it anymore right this second.

Have a great day!!

Free Falling

You know that old saying, “If a tree falls in a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it still make a sound”? Some will say yes, others might say no but I kind of need to know the answer and quickly. This is a legitimate question we have here. The reason I am wondering is because I am trying to decide if I am a little insane…not scary insane, but weird, goofy, lame insane. To explain myself further, I must expose a most embarrassing event that happened to me this morning at work. I was walking into the ladies restroom when suddenly everything started moving in a quick, downward motion…I was falling. What 24 year old person still trips and falls? Ashley does. It all happened so fast…my corporate life flashed before my eyes. In about one millisecond, 1000 thoughts went through my mind, none of them logical. What if my boss was in one of the stalls and came out laughing at me? What if I got hurt and couldn’t walk back to my office and someone had to carry me there in front of all my co-workers? What if…I broke my favorite pair of heels? The truth is that no one else was in there (thank goodness). Damn you rug. Damn you high heels.

This all brings me back to the original question. Shouldn’t I have been less embarrassed once I realized no one was in there to see (or hear) me fall? Well, it didn’t happen that way and I can tell you that I was entirely embarrassed. Then I started laughing which brought on another situation…there I was with my ankle half broken, my skirt out of control, my face red standing in the middle of the bathroom laughing when a lady from the Training Department walked in. I must have looked like such a loon…I didn’t explain myself I just quickly washed my hands and took off toward my office. Maybe this was the wrong move, but who can blame me.

I realize I am falling more the older I get and it isn’t right. Once in high school on the stairs, twice in college (no alcohol involved) and now at work. I can’t escape it…I am a 24 year old trip-artist.

I hope everyone has a fantastic week and that no one falls…and if you do, I expect you to tell about it so that I might feel better about myself.

Love you all!

I Did a Bad, Bad Thing

I may have stolen....no, I may have accidentally, haphazardly, by mistake taken home a cat from work. I know, I know, I already have a cat but this one was just too cute to pass up and I figured that Grenade could use a friend of his own. The whole thing started a few months back...my office has a large parking lot that backs up to a fence and on the other side of the fence there are a few houses. I had seen this particular cat many times, along with a few others, and couldn't decide if it belonged to anyone. It was always out in the parking lot dodging cars and eating out of the dumpster so naturally, I started to assume it didn't really have a home. A couple of months passed without seeing the cat; I didn't really think too much of it. Well, the other day here it came, strolling through the parking lot. It is so mismatched...I will try to describe this cat to you. It is NOT a kitten but it is the same size as one. Isn't that everyone's ultimate dream about animals, to have a kitten/puppy and have it stay that size forever?? It is so strange and I still can't figure out why it is so small but man, is it cute. It has a tiny little black head with the greenest eyes you have seen all put together on a somewhat fluffier brownish body. It must sound so "un-cute" but I promise you it is adorable.

Anyway, so Wednesday of this past week was D-day. I decided I was taking this cat home with me and so the operation began...a few ladies that I work with went in search of the cat and surprisingly, it was easy to find. We packed it up in an Office Depot box and I prepared to take my new pet home (all without informing my car pool buddy or my husband!! ) The ride home was intense...so many ridiculous thoughts were racing through my head. What if I stole someone's cat? What if they reported it to my company and I in turn got fired? What if it scratched my co-worker''s leather seats through the cardboard box and I had to pay to have them repaired? What if Drew got mad at me for bringing another cat home? What if Grenade hated it and decided to kill it in its sleep? None of these issues were enough to make me change my mind however; this cat was coming home with me. Now don't get me wrong, if it turns out that this was actually someone's pet, I will graciously return it. I am convinced though that even if it has an owner, it wasn't really being taken care of. Back to Operation Gato...my co-worker dropped me off at my car and I loaded my cat-in-a-box into the passenger seat of my car. I proceeded to call Drew on my way home the way I always do and while we were on the phone, the cat started meowing and loudly. I was busted. As soon as I got home, I toted the cat up the three flights of stairs it takes to get to the apartment and let it loose for Drew and Grenade to see. It was a hit!! Drew must really, really love me to allow me to have two cats....it has since been named Mismatch.

I have another topic on my mind as well...I will keep this person anonymous but I must share their story. A lady that I know has struggled to get pregnant for many years. Throughout all of her doctor's visits and whatnot, she recently was diagnosed with early ovarian cancer and her doctor urged her to have a hysterectomy as soon as possible. Anyone who has kids or wants them in the near future can imagine how devastating this would be. She began to pray for God to help her and her husband with this decision as it would change their lives forever. Finally, she decided to have her surgery in August and hoped that one day after things settled down, they could at least adopt. Last week at one of her pre-surgery appointments, she learned she was pregnant!!! This is what she had been praying for for many years and finally it had happened. She talked this over with her doctor and found that she could wait until after the baby was born to have the surgery...there is no doubt that this will be a difficult pregnancy but I know that God has given her this baby just in time. I will keep her in my prayers for sure and ask that all of you do to. What a miracle!

I hope all of you are doing wonderfully and I will continue to keep everyone updated on our search for a job, our new addition, and anythng else that comes to mind. I will also use this post to call out the other Porter Family...Don't Let the Blog Die!!!!! ;)

I Didn't Make Mac & Cheese...

I am dreaming of white sands and beautiful blue water today. I am at work and should definitely be working, and I have been, but all I can think of is getting to this beachy paradise. Next Friday I will be embarking on the infamous “family vacation” to Destin, Florida. I know for sure that it will be a complete blast but there are always those tiny thoughts that something could go terribly wrong. Nothing too terrible of course (as I pray for a safe drive and safe trip) just the usual events that arise due to having my brother Erik around. Erik is a rare breed…he can be completely hilarious one minute and then completely exhausting the next. Don’t get me wrong, I love him to pieces, but he is surely a rare breed. Since the time I was about 13 or so he has been terrorizing me with events such as chasing me with ice picks when I wouldn’t make him macaroni and cheese or leaving ransom notes on the bathroom counter for me to read when I would get out of the shower. One time in particular the ransom note was held against my cat, which Erik had evilly locked in a duffle bag and shut in the closet for me to buy back. I have to admit that I did…I bought my cat back for $10 out of fear that Erik would kill him if I didn’t. How hilarious he thought he was. Looking back I am almost sure that he would never have hurt me (notice I say almost) but at the time I half-way hated him.

Things have changes since then though…he hasn’t tried to kill me or anything else in at least 6 years so I would say all is well. Haha. My little brother isn’t so little anymore as he recently decided to join the United States Army. I believe it is his mighty destiny; he is already so proud and that makes me happy. He caught all of us a little off guard with his decision but we are all very proud of our soldier-to-be and will always keep him in our prayers.

So back to the trip…this will be the first time I have seen Erik since Christmas. I am anxious to see how he has changed after the intense training he has been through lately. For those of you who know Erik, he has always been a slight beanpole…a cute little beanpole, but a beanpole nonetheless. The last pictures that I saw of him showed a different brother, a man almost. I was a little emotional thinking of how grown-up he is now; I am very much looking forward to seeing him for vacation. I think this will be the best family trip yet since Erik and I get along these days and because my sweet husband will be coming along. Another plus is that one our friends is stationed at the Air Force base in Destin so we will get to see him as well. It should be good. I can’t wait in fact…I have already started getting my stuff together to pack, I dream daily of Pina Coladas and for the first time I am overly excited about a family vacation. Destin or bust!