Lemon Cake and a Farmer's Tan

So my aunt from Washington is visiting this week and we are having a BBQ this afternoon over at my mom's house.  The weather is Sugar Land is amazing today so we are all ready to party in the backyard by the pool!  My mom and step-dad are making all the food so I decided I would take one of my favorite cakes - lemon cake with raspberry filling.

I know what you are thinking...lemon cake?  I hated the thought of it before I tried it, but once I had a bite of this one I was hooked!  It is so easy - lemon supreme cake mix, lemon icing, cream cheese icing and seedless raspberry jam.  You just make the cake according to the directions on the box and then ice it with a mixture of half lemon icing and half cream cheese icing (add a little lemon juice too).  Put the raspberry filling in between the layers and that's it!

And another thing...I think I have a farmer's tan.  Boooo.  Drew and I went on a date last night and before we left, we took a few pictures.  I pulled them up on the computer and realized that my chest and face are horribly white while my arms seem to be more tan.  I'm not quite sure how this happened but oh well.  Maybe it will even out when the summer is here in full force!

Have a great Sunday!  XOXO

Our New Best Friend!

Yay!!  I have been wanting one of these for FOREVER and now, it finally lives in my kitchen!  I have mentioned this many times before but Drew and I are coffee lovers...cannot go to work without coffee.  Sad but true!

We loved our previous coffee maker but sadly (not really) it broke in the dishwasher this last time around.  Perfect reason to buy this little baby, right?  It is the Keurig Elite - one of those single cup coffee makers and I loooooooooove it!!  You can buy all sorts of varieties of coffees, teas and hot chocolates and the best part - it heats and brews your drink in about 30 seconds.  Oh sweet convenience, how I love you!  It is perfect for when you have friends or family over because usually no two people want the same thing.  They can pick whatever they want and go on with their bad selves.  :)

Love it!  XOXO

2 things I was better off not knowing about...

I learned two new things yesterday while attempting to shop at Target:

#1. Diet Dr. Pepper Cherry tastes exactly like… (dun dun dun) Diet Dr. Pepper. I had been soooo excited to try it because of my love for Cherry Coke. I was wrong to think this could pass the cherry test. The only difference that I saw was that the color was a little more reddish than usual…no difference in taste whatsoever.

#2. I have heard some bad ring tones in my day, but the guy behind me in line had a gunshot ring tone. I didn’t know whether to take cover or give him “the look.” Pretty strange if you ask me. I trust that none of you ladies have the gunshot tone but if you do, I sincerely apologize (or not). Haha!

Oh Target – you never cease to amaze me!!

XOXO

Boobies everywhere...pardon the title...

OK...I have absolutely NOTHING against ladies who decide to get breast implants and in fact, I have already decided that once I get done having all my sweet babies, I will get my boobs put back where they belong no matter what it takes.  All I have to say is this...

If you are going to get your boobs done, can they at least be semi believable rather than the triple Z's I see walking around here as of late??????????  I get it...boobs are a coveted thing among women and again, I see no problem with getting implants BUT COME ON!!!!

My friends and I went to the fabulous 6th Street in Austin, TX this past weekend and you would not believe the number of ginormous boobs that I observed.  These things were ridiculous.  There is a young lady in my office that has gone this route and wears bustiers (sp?) under her suit jackets...triple Z's should not be stuffed into restricting clothing.  

Am I wrong to impose such a limit on breast implants???  What do you think??  

Tide to the Rescue!

Looks like my new best friend for the next couple of days is going to be my trusty bottle of Tide. Apparently, I went on a strike from laundry and will now have to spend many nights washing, drying and putting away (the worst part if you ask me) a MOUNTAIN of laundry. My cats have basically made an obstacle course out of the piles of clothes…I am totally to blame!!

Ridiculous!!!!

Check out this email that was just sent out COMPANY WIDE – I’m saying that everyone in the ENTIRE Company received this (CEO, President, etc):


"Would whoever borrowed the heavy duty 3-hole punch from the Accounting cubicle area (near the kitchen) please return it as soon as possible. We’d greatly appreciate it!

ThanQ!"


As if this is the ONLY 3-hole punch in the building…and check out the salutation…who does that?

People.

Stuffed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Today it was a co-worker’s birthday so our whole department went out for lunch to celebrate…at the Cheesecake Factory! If you have ever been you will certainly understand the way I feel now. I am STUFFED (but happy) and am now in a food induced coma.

First they brought out bread, two different kinds. Then we ordered our entrees which were group under “lunch size specials” (must have been a mistake). Everyone’s food looked delicious but everything was HUGER than HUGE!!

Then came the cheesecake…enough said. We each ordered a piece; I chose the Chocolate Tuxedo Cheesecake. Yum and yum!!

I think this is a good excuse to take a nap. After all, I do work for a “sleep related” company. ;)

Eyelashes Beware

No makeup tool scares me more than the eyelash curler. Pardon my language, but ladies, this is one scary ass utensil if you ask me!!! My eyelashes are not straight so I haven’t had too much experience with one of these but the pure thought of the dreaded eyelash curler is enough to make me sick.

I know that if you use it properly there is not much that could go wrong, but one small move, sneeze, cough…anything really…will leave you lash-less in a matter of seconds.

You know what is even scarier?? The HEATED eyelash curler!! Not only can you single handedly pull out all of your eyelashes at once, you have the possibility of burning them off as well.

I can’t do it. I cannot bring myself to use this thing. I refuse.

Twitter Re-do

I got a new Twitter account (that is SECURED) so come check me out!!! :) The old one had issues...to say the least.

AccordingToAsh!!

Apparently, it is NOT "Just like you like it."

***Preface – I soooo would not have gone to Whataburger today but I had a meeting that ran way over with another one right behind it so I had to pick something FAST!!***

I kid you not, the following events took place at an H-town Whataburger…


Cashier: Welcome to Whataburger, can I take your order?

Ashley: Hi. I would like a two chicken strip meal with a Diet Dr. Pepper, please.

Cashier: Is that all?

Ashley: Yes, thank you.

Cashier: Would you like to add on an apple pie or a milkshake?

Ashley: No, thanks.

Cashier: Anything else?

Ashley: No…

Cashier: Would you like to make it a large fry and drink?

Ashley: No, thanks, just the regular meal.

Cashier: Is that all?

Ashley: …yes…

Cashier: Can I get you anything else?

Ashley: NOPE. THAT IS ALL. (are you kidding?)

Cashier: Please pull forward to the first window.


………………………pulling forward……………………………


Cashier: Would you like to add on a last minute pineapple turnover?

Ashley: …GAEIUG%*#@AEHN##AIEHN*AEUHRBPA. THE END.

Easter Eggs...Gone Horribly Wrong!

Hay ya'll!!  Can you believe that Easter is THIS Sunday??  WOW...time really does fly!  I guess now is as good a time as any to tell about my Easter egg shenanigans of the past.  

Who hasn't tried the "latest and greatest" egg dying kits at least once in their lives?  I am no exception.  One year in particular, my dad got me the tie dye kit and we couldn't wait to try it out.  We made a little assembly line out on the porch, the weather was perfect...little did we know about the hideousness that would soon occur.

The way it works SHOULD have been simple.  You take your egg, wrap it in a special fabric and then use a dropper to mix and match different colors.  The goal is to end up with perfectly dyed eggs, tie dye style!!

This is what the eggs should have looked like...

...but they really looked more like THIS!!!!  Boooooooo.

Instead of actually producing the tie dye effect, the colors tend to run together and you end up with ridiculous eggs and a waste of time.  In theory, they would have been fabulous!

My solution??  Eggs wraps!!!!  They are amazing and couldn't turn out better.  I have always dyed the eggs a BRIGHT color (as opposed to the drab browns/greens above) and THEN put on the eggs wraps or "shrinky dinks" as I so lovingly call them.  Then you can take it from there and add whatever you want!

Ever had an egg dying disaster???  Ever tried egg wraps??

Down with Taco C...

I am soooo bad...I haven't written a post since last Wednesday!!!  Things have been so incredibly busy.

Tonight was going to be the night that I got back into the swing of things but I just got home from work and I am almost certain I feel the early symptoms of food poisoning brought on by Taco Cabana.  Blahhhhhh.  That is how I feel - I am so not in the mood for food poisoning.

XOXO

Give Me a Ring-a-ling...

Yayyyyyy! I am finally up for a cell phone upgrade and I couldn’t be happier. I absolutely love my current phone (Blackjack) which I have diligently kept for two whole years (a feat previously unknown to me!). It has been the perfect phone…until last week when I dropped it. It now sports a fashionable rubber band which is necessary to hold the battery and back onto the phone and therefore necessary to operate my sweet little Blackjack.

So, here’s my question: Which phones do you recommend? I need something Blackberry-like with email capabilities. Do you ladies have phones that you love or even phones to stay away from??

I hate wait to see the suggestions – I need major help selecting a new phone (even though I have my eye on the iPhone if you couldn't tell from the picture above!!).

WOW...is all I have to say.

Do you need a good laugh?? If so, check out the Anonymous comment on this post.

I have no idea how to respond but apparently I am a GD B*tch.

WOW.